The Door Handle and the Direction We Take

4 November 2026 — Journal

On my way to work, I found myself reflecting on the way I have been living.

Daily life has a way of occupying us so completely that we sometimes forget to ask what we are doing, and why.

Illness in the family, the needs of our children, responsibilities at work, things waiting to be completed. In the midst of it all, I began to question my own presence.

How much of what we do for others is given with genuine attention?

Is being physically present the same as truly being there?

Sometimes we are in one place while our thoughts are somewhere else. Our phones, unfinished work, expectations, and possibilities that have not yet become realities.

We struggle even to pay attention to ourselves.

The seasons of life

It is autumn.

I find myself observing the changes of the season: leaves falling from the trees, rain returning to the earth, nature preparing itself for another condition.

Every season has its own requirements.

Perhaps we sometimes forget which season of life we are living through.

We expect the conditions of spring in autumn, or resist what a particular season brings.

Yet every period of life may carry its own responsibility.

Perhaps the point is not to live every season in the same way, but to understand what the season we are in asks of us.

This may be where direction begins.

Not in arranging everything according to our wishes, but in seeking what is right within the circumstances we have been given.

What we believe we control

How much of life can we truly control?

While considering this question, I thought of a door.

We may be able to turn its handle. We can make the decision to open it and act upon that decision.

But we cannot entirely determine what lies beyond.

Sometimes we do not even know whether the door will open.

Still, we want control over everything: the opening of the door, what awaits us behind it, and what will happen afterwards.

Perhaps there is an important distinction here.

To exercise our will is one thing. To assume authority over the outcome is another.

Our responsibility may be to reach for the handle, not to command every possibility beyond the door.

Naming the unknown

We are quick to define our experiences.

Good or bad. Success or failure. Right or wrong.

As though giving something a name means we have understood it, or perhaps brought it under our control.

But must every experience be defined immediately?

Sometimes understanding requires time. Sometimes even time is not enough.

What seems unfortunate today may eventually lead us towards an unexpected opportunity. What we celebrate today may carry consequences we cannot yet see.

This suggests a certain humility towards our own judgements.

Can we learn to live with something before we fully understand or define it?

Trust, surrender and responsibility

These reflections brought me back to the idea of tawakkul — placing trust in God while fulfilling one's responsibilities.

Does trust mean remaining passive and waiting for things to happen?

I do not think so.

We still have to act, to make an effort, to exercise judgement and to carry out our responsibilities.

But taking responsibility for our actions is not the same as claiming ownership over their outcomes.

We may work carefully and sincerely towards something, yet its result may not follow our expectations.

And when that happens, disappointment can turn into resistance.

Perhaps surrender is not the absence of desire.

Perhaps it is the ability to remain faithful to our direction even when our wishes are not fulfilled.

Trust must include effort. Surrender must not become an excuse to abandon responsibility.

Continuing the journey

At certain moments in life, we may look at what has happened and say, "This was not my choice."

And perhaps it was not.

Yet another choice remains: how we respond, how we carry out our responsibilities, and which direction we take from here.

We may not understand everything.

We may not be able to name everything.

We certainly cannot control everything.

But none of this releases us from responsibility.

To do what is within our capacity, to reconsider our decisions, to recognise our mistakes, to seek forgiveness, and to continue walking.

Perhaps direction is not primarily about arriving at the outcome we desire.

Perhaps it is about understanding what our actions serve, and remaining attentive to that purpose.

So today, I leave myself with a question:

Without knowing what lies beyond the door, with what intention do I reach for its handle?

Burak Tosun

4 November 2026

Orijinal Defter / From the Notebook

Adapted from handwritten notes dated 4 November 2026.